*veritaserum*

- Veritaserum -

I am an individual who constantly seeks for answers in this mysterious word called life. I am trapped in my own complicated realm --- full of questions, full of doubt. I know nothing about the real meaning of purpose and existence. I am a mere fraction of the unknown. My plea is unheard. My calling emanates from the borders of the burnt pages of hysteria. No one understands. No one does. Where do I even begin? But in this yearning, dreaming and seeking, I keep my faith in the only ONE I ever trust, my God. The pain may hurt me several times but I will not bow down. I believe. I trust. I live. I must follow what lies ahead. I am still His follower. I have no right to complain or to elude what was written down before me. I may still be living under the shadows of hatred and anger, but, God is with me. What have I got to lose? There is only one thing I am afraid of, and that is to never be able to come back to my Savior. How do I find what is true and real when all i have come to know are all lies and betrayment? How can I be worthy of His word? When I am starting to lose touch with Him? Would He accept me again? I am nobody. I am again being summoned by the waves of unfaithfulness. The screaming continues inside me. I am no longer free. Bring me back to where I was before. The girl who never fails to remember. The girl who believes. The one who loves God so much. The girl who used to be me. . .

(10.47pm)